The Week I Didn't Write — Or Thought I Wasn't Going To

With only a conclusion, a final proofread, and one final class to attend, I am just hours short of completing my degree. Wow. How the time flies.

This week has been a relatively easy week for me. With only one paper left to worry about, it was a low pressure week as I allowed myself ample time to outline, write here and there, and just feel the unique sense of "yes, I have to do this paper, but no, I don't actually have to freak out about it because I have time to spare and everything is totally under control."

So I also decided that I wasn't going to worry about novel either. I would take a week off from writing. I need to start my revision soon, but I also needed to give my mind some time to rest, I figured. Time would allow me perspective on my work and also the mental recouping I absolutely am in need of. But as the week went on, a funny thing began to happen. Ideas started popping up everywhere, and once they did, it was like my brain just wouldn't stop.

I read a newspaper article — therein waited a great new topic for a book. I read a blog post — it sparked the idea for a great new setting perfect for an ensemble cast of characters. I thought about my novel — and an idea here, and a line of dialogue there.  I looked back at some of my other story ideas as I contemplate what will be next project later in the summer/fall, and with each section of my notebook I read, ideas just started flowing until I had no idea which I'll choose because they all seem so appealing right now!

I was amazed. I still am, hence why I'm blogging about it. Why, on the week that I decided to really take a break, did my mind suddenly kick into wonderful, creative overdrive? Why was I constantly scrambling to get down that idea before I left for a meeting, in the midst of conversation, and right before I was about to fall asleep? Don't get me wrong. It's a welcomed experience, and certainly good for my current and future projects! But it got me thinking about why this happened. And these are the things I came up with:

First, I definitely think this is an outgrowth of the discipline of writing. For a whole year now, I've been very dedicated to two different projects. Not to say I didn't practice the discipline of writing before, but this year was different. The year might have even been one spent on overdrive in terms of my writing, but that's okay, because I truly learned just how far discipline and ambition can take me. So now, I'm used to writing rigorously. I am used to holding myself to a demanding schedule. And while I think I can afford to tone it down at times, discipline creates better writing. And it keeps my brain thinking and exploring and creating. Certainly a plus!

I also think that with the end of school comes the advent of new things. New projects, new freedom, more time to write what I want and not work on papers that might be stimulating but are not actually helping me with my novel. I've known school was coming to a close for a long time now, and that freedom was just around the corner. But now I can feel it. And I'm excited. So I guess all these ideas are bubbling to the surface because I can now actually pursue them. I can write one project while planning the next. Maybe I'll even try writing two at once (but only if I am really having an overflow of ideas happening — or on second thought, maybe not!). Regardless, I think my subconscious is responding to the imminent freedom. And again, I'll take it. It's always been to have too many ideas than too few.

Finally, as I begin to revise my most recent novel, which I love a lot, I am also looking forward to writing new things. Throughout this year in particular, I have truly discovered the benefits, and the enjoyment within revising. But for me, I think the thrill of the new idea and the writing of that project that has long awaited me still outweighs the excitement of revising. Hence my brain constantly looking forward to the next first draft somewhere down the line.

So whatever the reasons, I'll certainly take it. It feels good to know that as I finish school, I am still ready to work. I am ready to pursue my writing with just as much gusto as I had during the school year, when deadlines and requirements spurred me forward. Only now, my love of story telling can be sole my motivating factor, and I can work in my own way, on whatever I want, whenever I want! It's quite liberating, I must say. But I am certainly indebted to the schooling that has helped me to get here. And I'm really looking forward to the future :)