Encouraging Yourself — Finding the Thing That Keeps You Going

Last night I went to the bookstore with my mother. While we browsed some books, mostly we poked around the selection of beautiful trinkets my local bookstore carries. After we'd selected our treasures, I said, "I have to go to the children's section."

Not looking for anything in particular, I headed over, happy to be surrounded by the books I love; the land I live in. My mother stayed behind look at other things while I made my way around the books, sometimes reaching out to pull one of the shelf, sometimes just to touch the spine. It's a quiet thing I do, being with the books even if I have no intention of buying one or evening reading the jacket copy.

Because here's the thing: sometimes I just need to be with the books. When writing feels tiresome and I'd rather be doing something else; when I fall behind on my schedule and I'm not sure I can make up the time; when I'm tired; when I doubt myself; when I become strapped with the worry that this book might not go anywhere and the question of am I just wasting my time; when I wish I had something more to show for all my hours and efforts; when I need inspiration; or when I really need to somehow, someway feel closer to my dream — these are the times I need encouragement most. These are the times when I need to go do something that perhaps no one else can do for me. I need to find that thing that will keep me going. That thing that touches my heart strings. The thing that encourages and inspires me. The thing that is most meaningful to me.

So here's way I do:

I just stand there. In the bookstore, in the children's section, I find my area of books: intermediate fiction. Then, I stand in front of the books and I admire the spines. My eye jumps from color to color, from title to title, taking in the physical books in front of me.

I think about the covers. The authors. The hard work that went into this seemingly effortless and beautiful story that is just patiently waiting to be picked up by the right hands — to touch just right heart. I move slowly from shelf to shelf, my gazing settling on the names of various authors, sometimes purposefully, sometimes at random. And then, after I've taken in the books and moved quietly amongst the shelves, I think to myself, "That could be me. This could be my book." And then sometimes I feel a bit tearful as I know that day will eventually come — that someday, I will see my book on the shelf. Someday, this dream will come true.

And then I am ready to work again.

You see, I usually don't tell people this. It's kind of vulnerable, admitting how deep this personal hope of mine really is, even if most people know it about me. And I know to some, this practice of imaging my book on a shelf might seem silly, but it's what keeps me going. In a way that nothing else does. Sure, I am hugely dependent on the support of my loved ones, the encouraging words, the excitement of new story ideas, and my honest love of writing itself. But seeing these books on a shelf, it just gets me differently. It makes me feel hopeful in a way that's hard to explain.

So whether you're a new writer or a veteran; an artist or a singer, I would encourage you to find a way to encourage yourself. Find your thing that gets you through — the one that inspires you in that unique, personalized way. Because it helps. It really does. And it bring you that extra boost of energy you need — an energy to keep working hard and to an energy to see the joy that sometimes gets hidden in the pursuit of your goal.

This Is the Stuff Books Are Made Of

Call me sentimental because it's graduation weekend, and mother's day (hi, Mom!), but the only thing I could think to blog about this week is this — life is full of good things that need to be appreciated, even amidst all the struggles.

That's quite a topic, you're thinking. And yes, it is! But the end of things often bring a time of reflection,  and often a little bit of nostalgia and sadness. Yet endings also let you realize just how great things have been; and how great they are.

This week, I have just been so overwhelmed by the outpouring of support, encouragement, and celebration I've received. But as I thought about it, that support is not limited to this week. It is not limited to graduation celebrations or words of congratulations. In fact, I've received support throughout my two years in grad school, and in many other times in my life (but for the sake of this post I'm going to focus on grad school). A multitude of people have helped me get through grad school, and though they may not realize it, their contributions were essential, however small they might seem to them. An email, a word of encouragement, a cheer when another assignment was completed, a "you can do it" when I felt like a I couldn't anymore — they were all important, and they were all greatly appreciated.

This week is an easy week to be appreciative. Times of celebration can make everything look good. But really, sometimes the truth is I simply do not stop to appreciate the network of encouragers I do have. In the busyness of life, I forgot that this shouldn't be taken for granted. I miss the love that's happening all around me because I'm too focused on getting myself to the goal.

But with school now over, as I bask in the tremendous amount of support I've recently received, I realize that this is the stuff I need to be cherishing. I need to soak it in. We all do. We need to relish the friendships and the laughter, this time in our lives that will never come again, and the people who are there with us as well as the people who helped get us to where we are.

All this might sound sappy, and I'm not going to lie. I can be a pretty sappy person. But for writers, this goes way beyond sentimentality. Beause this is the stuff that life is made of. And, therefore, this is the stuff that books are made of. Real relationships. Real feelings, good and bad. Complicated, co-existing emotions. Struggles. Wants. Hard work. Tears. Moments of joy followed by feelings of 'now what?' Celebrations. Encouragements. Long days. Life questions. Chasing dreams and holding loved one close. Telling people 'thank you'. Letting yourself cry in front of someone else. Trying your best when you might feel you have no idea what you're doing. And rejoicing in the love that exists all around you.

See, I may be writing this as a currently deeply grateful and hapy graduate, but I am also trying to keep my eyes wide open — to see this moment and chisel it into my mind; to lock this unique moment away in my mind to use for later. Writers not only need to observe, but writers need to live. We need to live in our moments and learn from our experience and hone all of our feelings and observations and truths and questions into our craft so that our characters are alive and our emotions are tangible.

So whoever, and wherever you are, look around. Take inventory of your life. Feel this moment. And then use it. Writing is important, but life should come first. For without it, there's really nothing to write about anyway.

Fights and Explosion! What to Look Out for When Writing the Exciting Scenes

You know that moment when you've reached the moment you've been waiting for? When you've been writing toward this big scene all along and now you are there? When you know the next pages will just fly out of you because you've been thinking about them so long? When the scene is so filled with emotion that you have to chase down your words because you brain is thinking faster and jumping around quicker than your fingers can type? That's where I was this weekend. One of the few and far between times when writing isn't just amazingly easy but it's also truly exhilerating. And now we can all collectively sigh, as we all think if only it could be like that all the time.

The reality is that exciting writing moments such is this don't occur often even though, man, they feel good. As I saw on my friend Peter's facebook post this week, most of the time we all just need to keep our butts in the chair until we produce that pages we need. But occasionally we hit the lucky moment of one of those rapid scenes where somewhere you magically just know what the characters say and think and move and do.

So what do we do when we reach these moments? I mean, obvious answer is we go with them, and enjoy them greatly. But what do we have to make sure not to miss? And in what ways can we elevate the scene to an even greater level?

Here are some things I think we should look out for. These are important all the time really, but especially in the most exciting scenes, and particularly those that are pivotal to the plot.

• Consistency of character. In our excitement, sometimes we come up with that great line and think of our future reader just being so in awesome of that witty line or poignant sentence. But the truth is if it doesn't work within who you are character is and what he consistently says or does, unforunately, it's got to go.

• Including important details. Sometimes in the heat of the moment, we forget to mention the little ticks and details that make the scene so tangible. Adding just one small fact such as the color of a shirt or a reference to a character's unique mannerism, or even inserting a subtle clue into the dialogue can make all the difference. Not only does it make the scene exciting, but it keeps it memorable. It makes it matter more.

• Watch your pacing. Pacing is a huge part of story writing, and often something that can be hard to figure out. When the pacing picks up in the exciting scenes, one thing to be careful of is that while you want it to be an accelerated pace in comparison take the time to help your reader understand exactly what is going on here — how the characters are feeling. Conversely, you want to make sure your scene isn't too slow. It still needs a decent clip to it. Rereading your scene with fresh eyes after a day or two can often help you evaluate this more clearly.

• Pay attention to what isn't be said (or isn't being done). So often, we focus on what characters say and the movements a character does. I think part of that comes from the fear that we want our readers to understand our message. We don't want to make it too subtle that they miss something. But what a character refuses to say or do speaks volumes. The secrets they keep are just as important as the words they reveal. Such secrets don't always have to be implicit either. You can call attention to the fact that a character started to say something and stopped. Or that in the chaos of a situation, she didn't choose the hallway everyone else did. Things don't always have to be verbalized to make an impact. But you want to make sure they are noticed. Because even if it does take a more sophisticated reader to pick up on the nuance of a moment, that moment can inform your character, or your situation, in ways perhaps no words can.

And, more for the sake of the writer than the writing,
• Remember this feeling to help you through the more difficult writing days. Because even though it might take a while, it is sure to come again.

I hope your exciting scene comes soon! Enjoy the writing, and know we're all struggling through the same things :)

Writing About Yourself - Applying What You Know About Fiction to Your Nonfiction

This guest blog was written by Jonathan O'Connor, a M.F.A. Writing student in Atlanta, Georgia. O'Connor has been published in SCAN Magazine and The Connector, and continues to submit to literary journals across the country. Currently, he is working on a novel and creating a professional portfolio. His inspirations include Lewis Carroll, Angela Carter, Neil Gaiman, Jean-Paul Sartre, and Albert Camus. O'Connor keeps a blog, Words From a Caterpillar, where he talks about writing, life, and the writing life. 

In second grade my teacher had us keep a journal that we would write in every day for at least fifteen minutes. We could write whatever we wanted, but I always found myself drawn to fiction. I thought my life was too boring. Most of my stories were about dinosaurs that could talk or people with superpowers. Sometimes the two mixed. Those stories were the best.

Although I've scaled it back a bit since then, I have to say that not much has changed. I'm still drawn to fiction, to magic, and the impossible. Through writing I'm able to create worlds, to use my imagination and birth characters that often take a life of their own. Because of this, I always made fiction my focus. I believed it was the only venue to release the creativity inside me. I was wrong.

This past year I found the journal I kept in second grade. I read all the stories I wrote in it. Not to pat myself on the back, but for a second grader, they were pretty good. As I turned the pages I saw that each story was more fantastic than the next. I began to wonder why I so vehemently opposed writing a simple journal entry. Then it occurred to me, although part of my love of fiction is world-building and character creation, I think there is an equally strong side of me that is terrified of nonfiction.

As a fiction writer, I can pick my moments. I can choose to insert my thoughts, feelings, or experiences in a story at my discretion. Nonfiction can be much more personal. By their very nature essays, memoirs, articles, and the like, tend to focus on some aspect of self. Even writing a cookbook can be extremely personal when you think about the role food plays in our lives. Today, however, for the sake of brevity I am going to focus on the personal essay.

When I first entered my writing program my idea of writing an essay was the same as writing a research paper. The funny thing was that I had been reading tons of different types of essays my entire life, but I never cared enough to examine how they were different. Take Walden for example. Sure, Thoreau is tackling a much larger idea about living simply (I know this is an oversimplification), but his collection of essays also rings very personal. He is talking about his experience and ultimately who he is, who he is becoming, and who he wants to be.

A good personal essay does these things. A great personal essay does this and adds aspects of fiction writing to help tell your very nonfiction story.

Here is a cheesy example of how applying your fiction hand can make facts fun:

1. UNAPPLIED: When I was seven I went to the beach for the first time. It was crowded and I got separated from my family. I was scared. 
2. APPLIED: The sand looked like it was steaming. I was holding onto my mother's sweaty palm before she let go. I don't remember why or how, maybe I was distracted by the orange sun or the foaming waves, but within seconds I had lost her. My unheld hand began to shake as older beach-goers surrounded me.

Nonfiction is about communicating facts in a engaging way. The best nonfiction I've read has been so stuffed with this that at times I forgot that what I'm reading is a true life experience. Most recently I've read A Common Pornography by Kevin Sampsell which is completely non-fiction but is so entertaining that I forget how diehard fiction enthusiast I can be. This is true of other books as well (I often get roped into books by Chelsea Handler for beach reads), but no matter the nonfiction, what stands out is that they all follow and much more strongly written and conceived version of "APPLIED" option two. 

In fiction, writers are tasked with creating a world from scratch, filling it with characters, and creating conflict. In nonfiction, much of that has been done for you, but the writer must take the information they have to work with and communicate it is the most creative, vivid, and authentic way possible. Maybe you aren't creating a brand new world for yourself, but to your reader, the nonfiction world you describe can be just as vivid, engaging, heart-wrenching, and new as any fictitious world you could have ever dreamt up. 

The End Is In Sight — Thoughts About Finding Balance and Making It Through My Final Semester

The semester has begun! And now, in the midst of readings and assignments, projects, deadlines, essays, my manuscript, and working full-time, I am feeling a little overwhelmed.

The beginning of every semester can always feel a little bit chaotic since you haven't yet fallen into the rhythm of schoolwork or know how to balance the assignments based on how long they'll take you or when they are do. But for me, this semester seems harder than others. It's the final push toward graduation and while I've done this whole school for a while, I still feel worried. I know, I know, I've made it through the craziness before some of you might say. But still. The truth is simply that I am tired. The accumulation of all the past two years is starting to be felt.  And as I look out over the next four months, a part of me worries that it will be more of a struggle than past semesters. 

Thinking about this, and particularly as I've noticed this past week of writing felt extra taxing, I've thought about this upcoming semester and what I can do to help my writing. One thing I definitely don't want to let slip is my writing itself. That's why I'm in school, right? And beyond school, I also know that these feelings of being pulled in many directions and of fatigue are not going to be limited to the time that I am in school, but extend to life in general. There is no doubt other seasons will present the same problems. So, I think it is particularly important for me, and all of us writers, to find a way to really carve out the time and space, and create a protection of sorts — to ensure that we stay both committed and productive.

So, as I've already begun to feel the pull towards sleep some nights and the stress of other projects that need to be completed, I thought of afew things I am going to have to do over the next few months to keep my writing strong, and myself sane.

1. Sometimes saying no to things and accepting that everything I do might not always be done to the utmost of my abilities. I don't know if you're like me, but when I commit to something, I tend to throw myself in entirely. I want to do everything to the very best of my ability; to make it as good as it can be. But...this is just not always feasible. Especially when we want to commit to such a time consuming project as writing a novel.

2. Scheduling my writing time in advance will be something I think will benefit me novel on the whole. I am someone who likes to know the schedule in advance so I can plan and figure out how to get all the things I need to do done within the time frame. So planning out my week in terms of upcoming schoolwork and writing will be helpful. Even just seeing it on paper benefits me I think.

3. Sleeping when I need to. A tired writer is not necessarily a good writer. Sometimes I make it work for sure, but when I am really, really tired, I think it's best to let myself get caught up and feel refreshed. Besides, when I'm really awake I can probably write the same number of pages in half the time.

4. Make sure I do other things besides just work. This will help prevent burn-out. And give my mind a rest.

5. Know it's not always going to be perfect, and I don't always have to get it done now. This one I struggle with for sure — particularly the second part. I am kind of a work-hard, why wait, just get it done type of person. But this can produce undue stress, though it can also lead to always getting things done early :)

6. Always keep my ideas flowing in the back of my mind. This might sound confusing, but even though I might not be sitting at the computer and actively writing doesn't mean I can't be thinking about my story at other times. Some of the best creativity comes at random moments. So keep your mind open at all times. 

In quantity or in quality, I want to make sure that my writing stays on the top of my priority list, so hopefully these things will help me get through the semester — in tact and with some good work to show for it. This is not to say, however, that I don't sometimes have to adapt or sacrifice a little bit of my writing time, or that I don't still need to work as hard as I can while I have these opportunities. But overall, it's about finding a balance: a balance that leads to good writing output and feeling good in your overall life.

I'll be sure to keep you posted as the semester unfolds! Please send your good thoughts my way, as I can use all the encouragement I can get. And of course, I'll be sending them right back at you! Good luck writing friends! 

A Blog on My Birthday — Lessons from the Past Year

Birthdays are a great time for reflection. And since today is my birthday, and my weekly blogging day, I thought this would be a great time to reflect on my writing over the past year, and the things we can learn on commemorative days such as these. So, since twenty four would make for way too long of a blog post, I came up with twelve things I've learned over the past year. Some are things I've learned for the first time, and some are simply lessons that have been affirmed over the past year, but all contribute to bettering your writing, and more importantly, becoming a better writer yourself. Hope you enjoy!

1. Write all the time. Over the past year, I've done a lot of writing. Completing two manuscripts, planning a third, and fully revising one, and while some days I can honestly say I am exhausted, the truth is that the more I write, the better I become. My last book was better than the one before, and my next will be better still. You learn as you write. And even if you can't trace it, or measure it, or quantify it in some way, writing all the time makes you better; and leads to more production — which is always good, because you never know which book will be your winning ticket.

2. Stay committed. There will be days when you just want to stop, or quit, or maybe scream. But seeing your project through is just as important as starting it in the first place. Creating goals can be a good way to do this. Creating a schedule helps, too. But no matter what system you use, staying committed makes all the difference. Writers will go through struggles. But real writers will also be the ones to persevere.

3. Make sure you have at least one writing buddy. My writing buddy has been supremely important in keeping me going, reminding me of my goal, and helping to develop my ideas. We don't necessarily work together or read each other's work all the time, but every time we get together we talk about our ideas, and work through our uncertainties. We encourage one another and throw out different ways a plot might go, or bring up important elements to keep in mind. Writing buddies are key. You may actually write alone, in a solitary space, but no writer can actually do it alone. You at least need someone who understands all your complaints about writing!

4. Tell people what you do, and accept their encouragement. This has been one of the greatest things for me this year, and something I've realized for the first time. I think I've said it before, but I have been blown away by the way people are interested in, curious about, and supportive of my writing. This has kept me going on lots of occasions. Telling people about your process invites them into a relationship with your work in some small way, and opens up lots of doors for support and encouragement — most of which miraculously come at just the right moment!

5. Remember how far you've come. Writing is a solitary act, and sometimes, after we've revised and revised or written and rewritten, it can feel as though we are not achieving quite what we want to achieve. But remember where you started. Every writer has at least one book sitting in the drawer, and that book may never do anything other than collect some real or virtual dust. But there is nothing wrong with this. Just think about how you used to be looking at the blank screen and now you have fifty pages. Or how bad your last manuscript was. Or how you used to write weak dialogue but now write engaging, page turning discussions. Don't forget the past. It will help you stay motivated for the future.

6. Make writing a priority. I've said no to plenty of plans over the past year, or made myself sit in front of my computer when all I really wanted to do was watch a TV show or hang out with a friend. Writing will only get done if you actually make yourself do it. Don't let it get lost in the shuffle.

7. Always be searching for new ideas. The project you are working on will eventually come to an end. Published or unpublished, just like when you get to the end of a good book and start reading slower so the last page takes that much longer to come, your manuscript too will have to be wrapped up in some fashion. And you want to be ready to move onto the next project. So remember to keep your eyes and ears open for the next great idea. It might come from a headline of a newspaper or the person sitting in the cube next to you. But wherever it comes from, make sure to be on the lookout, and to write it down!

8. Remember that you love this. I'm not sure that all of us writers would have the same answer about why we write, but take some time to remember just why you are doing this. Why do you love writing so much? What is it about books that makes you excited or tugs at your heart? Remember these things. Because on the discouraging days, this will ultimately keep you going.

9. Trust yourself, and your idea. It is super important to listen to the suggestions of other writers, and to study writing as a craft. But at the same time, you want to make sure to stick with what you know is right for you. My professor once said newer authors often give in to suggestions of their editors because they feel that they have to, even if they don't agree. I think it is supremely important to follow and consider the suggestions of your editor, or agent, but never forget that this is your work and you should ultimately stay true to what you believe.

10. Persevere. When people tell you it's not good enough, or raise their eyebrows in question when you tell them your idea — just keep moving forward. Part of the writing life is rejection, uncertainty, and lots and lots of words on a page before you get to something truly great. But keep going. Keep writing, even if for now, you're the only one who stands behind what you're doing.

11. Sometimes, take a break. Whether the break is a half hour longer of dinner, or going to bed early, or just a spontaneous dance party in your room, getting away from the screen can be just as important as sitting there. Creativity isn't always on the schedule we want it to be, so don't be afraid to let your mind rest for a little while. It will make all the difference in the end.

12. Be ambitious. Fear can definitely be a road block to this, but the more ambitious you are, the more likely you will be in meeting your goals. Of course, realistic goals are important, too, but selling yourself short will never get you anywhere. So think big. And work hard. And your ambitions will suddenly seem like they're in reach.